Hello Again

I think I am still in denial that the new year has already started. After a whirlwind fall full of visits, trips, holiday prep and celebration, shopping, and the requisite holiday cold/sickness, I am still recuperating on the couch. I am off of work today though so I guess it is time to stop hibernating and rejoin the rest of the world in making my new year’s resolutions. As evidenced in last year’s new years post, I am horrible in not only making resolutions, but in keeping them as well. But I suppose everyone has the same problem based on the fact that we all keep making the same ones every year. So I am hoping to make a list of reasonable goals for this year and put them in writing so my faithful five readers can keep me on track (hint, hint). 2012 is actually looking to be a fun year: ski day planned this month, trip to New York in February, long weekend in Atlanta in March (and hopefully Vegas as well), a new apartment in April, and some time this summer a California tour. So I think that is a good start to the year! So here is my list...

1. Blog more. I am going to write one full length blog a month. Plus a picture post once a week. Text/FB/email reminders are welcome.
2. Be active. I have been going to the gym off and on for the past year, but not with any regularity, so my goal this year is to no excuses, go two days a week every week. I hope to go more and often do, but then there will be sometimes be a two week period when I don’t go at all. So this way, I have two days planned every week so I can’t fall off the wagon.
3. Cook more. I really do like to cook, but I just get sick of leftovers so I often just eat out. I am hoping to start eating at home more often. My friends and I tried to start a once a week rotating dinner night, but with the holidays, we didn’t get into a routine. I think I am going to try to jump start that idea again. It is always more fun to cook for others!
4. Do something. Okay that is vague, but I am hoping to find at least regular activity that I have been missing lately. I miss singing, but as an adult there aren't a lot of opportunities other than church choirs for that. But there is an adult chorus in Columbia. Or maybe a charity that needs a volunteer on one Saturday a month, or possibly an ultimate frisbee team in the spring. My idea is to find something that I enjoy where I can meet other people. I have decided to stay here for at least another year, so I want to take advantage of the benefits of my job (flexibility, days off, set hours, minimal stress, etc.)
5. Try new things. Snowboarding will be first this year. I’ll let you know how that goes in my next post. Any ideas are welcome. Whether it is a new food, a new look, a book I wouldn’t normally read, or an activity. Time to explore my thirties...
6. Organize my past. I have slowly brought all of my pictures and journals and random memories here from mom’s house, but there is no sort of organization. Plus I have five years of digital photos on my computer that have never been printed. So I want to consolidate to a manageable amount of meaningful, documented, date ordered files/books. This may take longer than one year...
7. Learn. I keep tossing around this idea of going back to school, but then the pro/con list always leans heavier on the con list due to finances and responsibilities. I really do miss studying and learning new things and discussing with other people that are interested in the same ideas, but graduate school just seems a little out of reach. So I was thinking about on online course or continuing ed class at the school here. I’ll see what I find and keep you all posted.

I think that sums up the basic goals for this year. I think the basic theme is to stop letting time pass by and start living life. I know that is a pretty common and trite statement, but this is where I am at right now, so... here’s to 2012!

And because cute animal pictures make anyone smile...

Catch up

Ok so I skipped some days, but I was trying to condense 13 days into 30 minutes… it’s the best I could do for my 5th blog of the year…….


December 1 – One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you? (Author: Gwen Bell)

2010: Uprooting
2011: Reformation

December 3 – Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors). (Author: Ali Edwards)

How can you not feel alive after witnessing something so amazing as the birth of this little (or not so little) precious baby boy…

December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? (Author: Alice Bradley)

I let go of a lot this year… a longtime work environment, my house, a lot of stuff in the house after a garage sale, donations, and the free storage in my old bedroom, a whole city, my friends, my home… sometimes I think I let go of a little too much...

December 6 – Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it? (Author: Gretchen Rubin)

Santa brought a fancy new toy, so I made Double Chocolate Peanut Butter Drop and Butterscotch cookies yesterday. Even though the butterscotch batch happened by chance, they both were well liked at work today.

December 11 – 11 Things What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

1. Monotony
2. 25 pounds (or 30 before I am 30)
3. Excuses
4. Crutches (the emotional kind)
5. Three closets full of clothes in sizes 2-6
6. Anger
7. Regret
8. Fear
9. Futility
10. Debt
11. Repetition
(And Jenn, to help you out, I will take those 299 books…)

December 13 – Action When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step? (Author: Scott Belsky)

One action at a time… today, finally emptied the last two boxes of books, then alphabetized… still not sure if I should have separated fiction from non-fiction, but then I started thinking about real literature vs contemporary fiction, memoirs vs true stories, textbooks vs anthologies etc. So basic alphabetizing was my solution. This by the way is the excitement that is my life :)

The action...

Reactions

I cried too after the results – I think I felt a lot like Chris – it was hard to believe until it was official that the country didn’t make the same choices that we have been making based on fear and scare tactics. So I was excited, and watching Dr. King’s daughter react to the results made me believe that change is possible. For a moment I forgot that I was too scared to put a campaign sign in my yard because of the area that I live in. That I listen to people use words of hate on a regular basis and not even notice. That half of the people that helped make history also voted against rights for others. So I am hopeful, I want to believe that people really are good, and I want to do my part, but I am still saddened, by the denial of rights to another portion of our country…I don’t know what exactly in my life to attribute my feelings too either – I consistently have friends tell me that I vote based on my parent’s ideas – but I didn’t know how my parents voted until I was older. (Although I do credit my parents with raising amazing women!) Maybe as Chris mentioned, it was the religious upbringing, maybe it was the different environments I was able to live in, and maybe it is watching the hatred still prevalent where I live now. I don’t know exactly why I fell this way but I do think that everyone wants a better life, and most do not have the opportunities that I have been handed my whole life. So why shouldn’t my time, money, talents, strengths, etc. be put to use to help others. Maybe more people are realizing the beauty in building a real community, where differences are honored, and tolerance is common-place, where we help each other and not stand on others to get ahead. But maybe I am still an idealistic young adult…

Just an interesting snapshot of life here – these are my facebook and myspace friends’ mood/status in the 24-30 hours after the election. Minus removing the names and few spelling changes – these are the attitudes I see on a daily basis…a few willing to believe in change, but most… Oh and a prize for figuring out which one is a family member!


Is praying for America. (Nervous)

Is sad that I may never get to marry the love of life due to what other people think. (Aggravated)

Saw what "the change" was all about last night. (Disappointed)

Packin my bags and movin to Costa Rica.... who's with me.

Is scared for our country. (Shocked)

Thinks 2012 can't get here fast enough and is scared for our country (bummed)

Get a f*#&ing job, stop having kids and pay your own damn taxes. (Disgusted)

Is OMG a new beginning!!!!!! Go Obama! Changes are coming and the answers are blowin' in the wind...Amen! Oh Happy Dayyyyyyyyy! (Accomplished)

Is sad at the direction our country is moving in. (bummed)

Moving to Canada... Who's coming???? (Disappointed)

Is proud I voted for McCain!!

Is concerned about the next four years

Is going to be in DC for Election Day celebrating. I'm so grateful to live in this era. (Enlightened)

Ready to move back to the Cayman Islands...(Insert link to conservative site here).

"Welcome to the People's Republic of America or what I like to call an Obamanation of the ages..."

Wants to head back to Belize now!

Having a celebratory lunch today!

Thinks Obama better be ready to put his money where his mouth is.

Is moving to Canada. Anybody wanna come?

Still can't believe it. Now the real work begins! :-).

Is not ready for the govt to take money out of my paycheck and give it to the poor and illegal immigrants.

Likes to see the Dems in for the economy, we'll see about everything else.

Where do I get a Bumper sticker that says 1.20.13?

Loves that American finally wised up! Go Obama!

Thinks that 2012 needs to hurry up and get here!

Smile and grin at the change all around, pick up my guitar and play, just like yesterday, and then I'll get on my knees and pray we won't get fooled again.

"Socialism has come to America."

Well we hired a president who thinks that the gov't should steal from the people who earned it and give to the people who didn’t, is pro abortion, and is Muslim!

Is at least glad to know she lives in a sensible red state.

Is pissed at the results. There goes the neighborhood.

Is sad about the election.

And the world changed and another dream was realized

Welcome to the new U.S.S.A.

Is thrilled.

Is O-freaking-bama baby!! Yes we can!!

America, you asked for it...

Says "YES WE DID!"

Last toot for the night. He is the 44th president and well, 44 are about the only non prime number that I like! geee? 44fish?

Is wondering where to sign up for my government handout.

I hope he can back up all that "TALK" of his...

Young barak obama I’m all for it. Haters began hating or just thank bush.

Saying I’m glad that I’m alive to see this moment in history.

Yes, we did!!!!

Yes We Did.

I have never seen an election like this before. It's almost like everyone is acting like we just won our independence again.

Believes this is a dark day in America. There goes capitalism, national security, and freedom.

Is thinking about his 401(K). Will I still get a tax break after this election?

♥ Barack Obama.

Is praying...

Doesn’t think his money should have to pay for your uncle's prostate exam

Voted Pro-Life and it only took 6 minutes...gotta love Paulding County.

Is clinging to his bible and his guns and would also like to reiterate that change is not a destination, just as hope is not a strategy.


****Disclaimer - These are other's opinions - not mine.*****

Too much, but still missing something.

Ok, so quick catch up…I really haven’t fallen off the face of the earth, just been… well quiet. I guess I needed a little regrouping lately. I still can’t figure out what I am looking for I guess (see Resolution post). I keep trying new things and hanging out with more people, but I just feel overwhelmed. This weekend, I turned off my phone and spent the weekend with Moxie. I think it was definitely the right thing to do, but still no direction. I have a clean house, a clean dog, a mowed yard, completed work, and now a new blog post, to show for this weekend though! Just to keep you updated for the past few weeks: I went to the lake with the triplets,-the normal summer spot, celebrated some birthdays, went to a funeral, caught up with mom when she passed through, went to Florida for a work conference, broke up with my boyfriend, had a new nephew, took scuba diving lessons, saw my goddaughter eat cake for her first birthday, lost a good friend, went to a club, bought some stuff at the fun Swedish furniture store, saw some fun creatures, worked, and well worked! I promise more to come soon… birthday adventures and another beach trip…

Indecision

e·quiv·o·cal - /ɪˈkwɪv ə kəl/ - adjective
-of uncertain significance; not determined

That about sums up my thought process right now. So the big decision is this: to moxie or not to moxie. Seems the hyperactive little fur-person somehow broke her tie-out, jumped out of a 6-foot privacy fence and then into another 6-foot fence to visit the neighbor’s dog (who by the way was recovering from surgery and not looking for a play partner). So I now face a decision I was putting off as long as possible.

For the past year and a half, little moxie has been staying in “foster care” with an extremely generous friend while I finished school. Unfortunately, that time has come to an end due her latest escapade and the caregiver’s increasingly dwindling time. I have at most three options in my mind:

1. Finding a home for her myself. This means screening applicants and maybe giving her to someone who would love her as much as I do. However, this also means she may go to someone who cannot handle her unbridled energy and she could end up in the dreaded shelter. This idea also includes a lot of effort and internet searching to find the perfect family. But on the upside, she may find the perfect home and I could hopefully get updates and pictures from time to time.

2. Adoption society for boxers. With this option there is no doubt that she ends up in a home with a family that understands the needs of such a high energy breed, BUT (and this is a big but) I sign away all rights and never know where she is or how she is doing in her new home.

3. Bringing her home! Right now seems like horrible timing because I want to do all these new things and try to find my place after graduation. Plus my house is on the market, which is a very slow and competitive market. I have put my best friend (who happens to be my real estate agent) on a fact finding expedition. She is going to talk to a seasoned real estate veteran to find out what my options are with a dog in the house with people looking and visiting my property. So that is in the works. Then there is the task of finding ways to help train Moxie and to expel her excess energy when I get home from work. Plus the many questions that surround the balance of my life outside my home and spending more time here in the middle of nowhere. I do not have friends that live in this direction and I am an hour from work, so having a dog here means less time with others and less time at the gym that I just joined – BUT I did it before and things weren’t all bad. Plus I keep thinking: who gives up on their children? Why can’t I sacrifice some of the things I want to do in order to keep my baby? I know she isn’t a person, but she is my fur-person and that means just as much. The other part to this is that I can try. Then if after a month or two, I realize that adoption is the better choice, I can still do that. And then I don’t ever have to look back and think, why did I not even try?! The other way around (chosing adoption right away), I never have a second chance.

So these are the options and I am running out of time to decide, but I don’t want to give up on such a loving animal. She is MY Moxie after all. But maybe what is best for her isn’t being with me either. HELP – I need some weigh-ins on this one. I know that ultimately it is my life and my decision, but any advice or thoughts on the matter may help swing the pendulum in one direction or the other.

Resolution

Resolution: the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action, method, procedure, etc.

I don’t usually make New Year’s Resolutions. Everyone states the same obvious goals and most fall short of the finish line. This year, however, I decided to make one resolution – to start living, really living. Some days I feel as if I am drifting through my life. Not that I am not grateful for what I have, after all, I realize I have more than a lot of people ever will. I just feel that life is passing by more quickly than I can grasp it, feel it, experience it. I have a good job, great friends, a loving family, a nice house, a nice car, but I am missing something.

Passion! So whether it is a new place to live, a trip to someplace new, a new job, more school, or something I haven’t even thought of yet – I think this year needs to be the year I find something I am passionate about and live!!

So maybe I will go to the gym more, eat better, clean more often, not get upset at the small things, pay off debt, or any one of the many things we all mean to do, but hopefully I will see more and experience life and all it has to offer.

What will you do?